Monday, September 1, 2008

Who needs sleep?

Isaac slept in his crib for the first time last night. We had only started cosleeping because I couldn't find any other way to get him to sleep at night. It worked for a while, but for the past three or four weeks he's been waking up every two hours again, just as he did when he was a newborn. I started to wonder if sleeping so close to me wasn't keeping him up now instead of helping him sleep. Wondering if, every time I moved, I woke him up, which woke me up. I thought I'd experiment to see if sleeping in his crib would help him sleep better. And help me sleep better. Also, I'd been thinking about transitioning him out of the bed and transitioning John back in. John hasn't slept in the bed since Isaac started sleeping there.

So, last night I tossed everything that was in his crib on the floor (I'd been using it as storage, since he wasn't sleeping in it anyway), yanked the crib bumper out, turned on the night light and prepared for a long battle. The first time I got him down, it was about 9pm. I left his room with mixed feelings. In a way, I was excited about the prospect of getting some sleep, but I was also kind of depressed. I missed Isaac. I enjoyed having him in my bed, even if we were constantly waking up. But I realized I may be cosleeping because it's better for me, and not necessarily because it's better for Isaac. I know my little man needs to sleep, and I want to do whatever I can to help him sleep. But I definitely missed having him in bed.

I was also, of course, running through my mind all of the horrible things that could happen to him in his sleep, without me right next to him. I was worrying myself sick about SIDS when, to make matters worse, I found John in the living room watching a Discovery Health program about a man who almost lost his leg to a brown recluse bite. So then I start thinking Isaac's going to be bitten by a spider or other horrible creature, all the while remembering a story I'd heard about a snake that got into a baby's bed and wrapped itself around the baby's little body. I was a nervous wreck, and John just shook his head, thinking I was absolutely crazy to be so worried.

I didn't have to worry long. Isaac was up again by 10. Then again at 11. And again at 12. I finally went to sleep at 12 and didn't wake up again until I heard him at 5am. I was excited that he'd slept five hours. Maybe there's something to this crib sleeping, I thought. Then I realized, he was sleeping in the opposite direction I had left him. John said he woke up at about 1am, but John got to him before he could wake me up. When he woke up at 5, I just brought him to bed with me, and by 7, we were up for the day. So, four hours. I'm not sure he did any better than he would have in bed with me, but I figured we'd try it a few more nights. If there's a chance it's going to help him sleep better, then I want to try it.

The funny thing? After all that, John still slept on the couch. I think it's become a habit.


Tasha said...

It's great that you're trying new things, and that you have your baby's best interest at heart. He'll thank you one day...maybe not TODAY, but one day ;)

Hope the coming nights offer you some rest!

Natasha said...

The brown recluse fears strike again! I've worried them, too. Even though I bet we've seen one or two in here within the past year, but still.

The only thing I can do when I start to worry like that is to think in great detail about what all I have to do the next day - open my eyes, put my feet on the floor, make coffee, etc. For some reason, that helps to put it all in perspective. If nothing else, sleep comes more easily.


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